There’s a corner of the internet where actual sentient grown-ups are arguing that The Beatles endorsed child sacrifice and invented ‘woke-ism’

Amid the chaos, violence, madness and mayhem of the January 6, 2021 riots at the US Capitol in Washington DC one insurrectionist in particular stood out from the mob: The Twat In The Hat. 

Barechested, tattooed, sporting a horned headdress, furs, red, white and blue facepaint and a spear, 37-year-old Jacob Chansley self-identified as the ‘QAnon Shaman’, instantly becoming the public face of a shadowy collective of  disparate right-wing conspiracy theorists who believe that the free world is under attack by a cabal of Satan-worshipping paedophiles in government, business, the media and the arts. As Chansley was sentenced to 41 months in prison for his part in the riots, his own lawyer dismissed followers of QAnon as “fucking retarded”, but the movement’s popularity and reach continues to grow, even without their talismanic spiritual guru.

In 2022, however, having failed in their mission to overthrow the elected government of the United States of America, it appears that QAnon are re-deploying their sharpest thinkers in a new battle for hearts and minds, dedicating their energies towards – checks notes – convincing the brainwashed masses that The Beatles were elbows-deep in witchcraft and the celebration of child sacrifice, and were, simultaneously, created and financed by the UK government to popularise ‘woke-ism’. Which seems like an excellent use of everyone’s time, and no mistake.

RollingStone.com reports that posters on GreatAwakening.win, a popular QAnon message board, are insisting that Paul McCartney is dead, arguing that John Lennon was assassinated by communists, maintaining that the group were in thrall to occultist Aleister Crowley, and, were almost certainly, Freemasons.

“Elite mfs want to normalize pedophilia & child sacrifices” one commenter posted on Twitter. “This is just the highest level of evil.”

“The truth is that the Beatles popularised wokeism in the United States”, ‘Memetic warfare strategist’ and ‘anti-woke journo’ Sameera Khan writes on Twitter.

Khan also recently shared the controversial “butcher” album cover for Yesterday and Today, which was withdrawn by the band, and hints that the Fab Four were most probably invoking whispering demons from Islamic cosmology.

Quite.

Check out RollingStone.com for the full chilling investigation into The Beatles’ wicked ways. Sorry, delete that, that should read “to see the full extent of the utter shite these numbnuts are dribbling across the universe.”

Source: loudersound.com